Professor Nick Cutter (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
itsananomaly) wrote2023-06-02 04:55 am
itsananomaly) wrote2023-06-02 04:55 am
MHA #16 - Thursday, after the clinic
Connor had been released from the clinic and Cutter was determined to look after him as he helped nurse him back to health.
It was the least Cutter could do to take care of Connor, he was the reason he was in this position. He felt so guilty that he had let it get this bad, that he hadn’t checked on Connor until it was nearly too late.
“Is there anything you need?” Cutter asked softly as he got Connor set up on the couch, “anything at all, I’ll get it for you,”
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor settled back against the couch and got comfortable. He was feeling better than when he had gotten to the clinic. But then, anything would be better than how he had felt then. He still hurt and even the simplest of things wore him out. He looked at Cutter and gave a small, almost apologetic smile. "Another blanket and some water would be nice" he said softly. Connor wasn't used to being doted on, so he was trying not to be too needy or too much of a burden right off the bat. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
"Of course," Cutter said softly, hesitating and then gently brushed Connor's hair out of his eyes, if this was any other time he would have placed a kiss on Connor's forehead but he knew he didn't have that right now, "I'll just be a moment," he went and got the extra blanket and a glass of cold water, "here you are," he said softly, placing the glass down on the table so that he could wrap Connor in the blanket and get him comfortable. "Do you need help to drink the water?" he asked softly as he got the glass and brought it over. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor shifted slightly as Cutter wrapped the blanket around him and he couldn't help the small smile that formed. It was nice... being with Cutter again... even if he was still hurting and not feeling totally like himself just yet. "Thanks... Nick" he said softly as he looked at Cutter and then dropped his gaze, eyes falling to the newly bandaged hand that lay in his lap. He slowly looked back at Cutter. "I...I think I'll be fine...." he said as he reached his good hand out for the glass. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
And Cutter slowly returned that small smile, the first one that he had had in ... a few weeks at least, "you're welcome," he said softly as he got the glass and carefully handed it to Connor, "here you go, are you right to take it?" he asked, making sure that Connor was right to take the glass. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor nodded and took the glass, steadying his hand as he took a couple of sips. When he was done he handed the glass back to Cutter and leaned back against the couch pulling the blanket closer as he tried to relax. "I... I wanted to..." Connor looked up at Cutter and suddenly words seemed to escape him. "I wanted to say.. thank you. for... ya know..." he said with a nod towards where he was currently lounging on Cutter's couch, Rex curled up in his lap. The little guy had refused to leave his side once he had come back from the clinic. Not that Connor could really blame him. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter nodded at that, looking at Rex curled up on Connor's lap, “you’re welcome,” he said softly, “I … I’m sorry I didn’t check in on you sooner,” he trembled, “I should have when you didn’t text me … it’s … it’s my fault, I let this get so bad,” he realised there were a lot of implications in that and right now he meant all of it, there was so much he had to apologise for, to make it right. He took a deep breath, “I’m going to do everything I can to make it up for it,” |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor nodded slowly. He was tired and he hurt. He knew he wasn't thinking clearly, but it was nice, being with Cutter again. Talking, being able to see him, he had missed it. More than he wanted to admit. Connor knew he would have to figure all of this out, make sense of the complicated feelings still swirling around inside him underneath the pain and fatigue, But that was for later. Right now, he had to focus on getting better... and trying not to worry about just how badly he had messed his hand up. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter watched Connor for a while, he had missed being with Connor and he desperately wanted to make things right again but he knew that was going to take time, “are you hungry?” he finally asked, “I can order you something if you’d like?” He had definitely learnt his lesson about trying to cook something himself. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Chinese or something would be nice" Connor said with a small smile. It would be kinda like old times... except, so different in so many ways. still, that familiarity was really appealing to Connor right then. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
And Cutter smiled softly at the mention of Chinese, “I can definitely order some Chinese, is there any particular dish that you would like? I can order in a few dishes and that there’ll be leftovers for later if you’d like that?” He was trying to ignore the pang in his heart as he talked about what had once been their ritual with Chinese leftovers. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Some chicken and rice, Mongolian beef, and egg rolls would be nice. If... If you don't mind" Connor said with a grin. He still felt odd, doing things so similar to what they used to, but still having the constant reminder of what had happened and why Cutter was here taking care of him in the first place. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter slowly and carefully made a note of that since he still didn’t quite have the strength in his hands to write quickly. He was trying not to feel guilty that if he hadn’t pushed Connor away, this would all be very different now. It was his fault and he had to fix this …only he didn’t know how. But doing something familiar might help, “okay and I think I’ll have a wonton soup, curried chicken and I’ll some Mongolian as well,” he said with a small smile at that. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Sounds good, thanks" Connor said. And as he sat and watched Cutter placing the order and getting everything ready, Connor couldn't help but give a small yawn. It had been only a day or two since he had left the clinic. He was still in rough shape and his energy was definitely not where it had been before everything had happened. "Sorry Nick..." he said as he tried to hide another yawn. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
“You don’t need to apologise for anything Connor,” Cutter said softly, wishing there was more that he could do, “did you want to sleep for a while before the food came? We can always reheat the food if you would rather sleep?” |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Maybe just until it gets here?" Connor said softly. "It's lunch time in London... it will probably take a it to get here anyways." |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter stopped at that, hearing Connor talk about London ...as if they were still there, his heart broke, "oh Connor," he said softly, "we ... we're in Fandom," he said, "delivery's a little bit quicker here," |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Oh... r-r-right... That's right" Connor said softly as he shifted on the couch. "I... I'll wait for the food. Can always rest later, right?" he said with a somewhat strained laugh. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Maybe we.... could find some reruns of |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter smiled softly at that, "we can do that," he said, "I ... that ..." he hesitated, "that sounds really nice, I ..." he stopped, "I'll see what I can find," he said as he carefully picked up the remote and turned on the tv, flipping through the channels until he came to one that looked like it was showing reruns of |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"That sounds nice" Connor said with a tired smile as he shifted to make room for Cutter to sit if he wanted. And as tired as he was and as conflicted as he still was there was just one thing Connor wanted right then. And that was to be with Cutter- however that ended up being. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter hesitated for a bit before he sat down next Connor, he knew he didn't have the right for things to go back the way they were, Connor had every right to be mad at him but he couldn't deny the small part of him that was very hopeful that maybe, just maybe there was a way back from how badly he had screwed up.
"I ... I haven't actually watched any |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"I... haven't watched much of anything really since... since we got back" Connor said after a moment's thought. The few times he had turned the TV on, it was more background noise, just something to fill the silence so he didn't go mad spiraling with his thoughts and all. "I think... it'd be nice... to sit and watch some shows... just for a bit." |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
"That does sound really nice," Cutter admitted as he got comfortable on the couch, he wanted so badly to lean against Connor, like they were able to do before but he knew he didn't have the right to at that moment, it was something he would have to talk about to Connor but that was something they could talk about later. "The food shouldn't take to long to get here, I think that sounds like a nice idea, eating Chinese and spend some time watching shows," |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor nodded and looked over at Cutter, wanting to reach out and put an arm around him, or put a hand on his knee, something... but he didn't. He sat there and stared at the TV for a moment, wanting to say something... but knowing how to even begin to put what he was feeling into words. And as fate would have it, the island seemed to intervene just then as there was a knock at the door. Connor jumped slightly at the sudden noise then looked over at Cutter and grinned sheepishly. "Sounds like the food is here..." |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
"Sounds like it," Cutter said with a small grin, maybe a bit relieved that the food had arrived because he had no idea what he actually wanted to say to say to Connor and the silence between them had started to get a bit awkward ... "I'll get the food," Cutter reluctantly got off the couch and headed to the door and opened it, he paid for the food and tipped the driver before closing the door behind him and heading back to the couch. He placed the dishes on the table, "here we are," he said with a small smile, "would you like another glass of water? I could get you something else if you'd like?" He wasn't actually sure what he had in his fridge but surely he had something other than water? |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor watched Cutter leave, surprised at how empty the couch felt in just that short time he was gone. He gave a small smile as he watch Cutter lay out the food. "I'd say a beer would be nice.... but doc said none until I finished the meds" he said with a sigh. "Soda or something would be nice though." |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter smiled softly at that, "that's fair enough," he hesitated, "I should probably be laying off drinking as well," he sighed as he went to the fridge to see what he did have there, he found a bottle of cola and took it out and got two glasses as well. "How does cola sound?" he offered as he carefully held up the bottle. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Sounds good to me. All of it sounds good... Chinese food, drinks, terrible reality TV... sound like a good way to spend an afternoon" Connor said with a smile. It was almost like old times... and Connor was content to just pretend, even just for an afternoon, that things could be the way they were before everything had happened. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter smiled warmly at that, "it does sound like a good way to spend the afternoon," he agreed as he started to get the dishes ready and poured the drink in the glasses, "it ... it sounds really nice," He was trying to not get his hopes up that this meant that they could find a way to get back together again, he hesitated about to say something and then he changed his mind, "here you go Connor," he said gently as he put his dishes in front of him on the table. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Thanks, Nick"Connor said with a sincere smile as he picked up one of the dishes and a fork and started digging in. Considering he was going one-handed as his injured hand was back to begin fully bandaged now, Connor decided to forego the usual chopsticks in favor of simple and easy. "This is as tasty as I remember," he said with a thoughtful nod. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor watched Cutter leave, surprised at how empty the couch felt in just that short time he was gone. He gave a small smile as he watch Cutter lay out the food. "I'd say a beer would be nice.... but doc said none until I finished the meds" he said with a sigh. "Soda or something would be nice though." |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
"You're welcome Connor, it's ... this is definitely nice," he said softly as he settled back down on the couch and got his wonton soup, unlike the last time he had wonton soup, he decided to stick with a spoon this time and took a mouthful of soup. "I've ... I've missed this," he finally said, not daring to say anything more but sitting here with Connor and eating Chinese food and it almost being like old times ... He wished the ache in his heart would stop, it was his fault while they were in this position to begin with, he didn't have any right to expect that Connor would get back together with him but at the same time he missed this ... |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
"Sounds good to me. All of it sounds good... Chinese food, drinks, terrible reality TV... sound like a good way to spend an afternoon" Connor said with a smile. It was almost like old times... and Connor was content to just pretend, even just for an afternoon, that things could be the way they were before everything had happened. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter smiled warmly at that, "it does sound like a good way to spend the afternoon," he agreed as he started to get the dishes ready and poured the drink in the glasses, "it ... it sounds really nice," He was trying to not get his hopes up that this meant that they could find a way to get back together again, he hesitated about to say something and then he changed his mind, "here you go Connor," he said gently as he put his dishes in front of him on the table. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor nodded with the faintest of smiles. They were getting stuck on the word "nice" again... just like old times. Connor ate a bit of the food in silence and then set the dish down and leaned back against the couch. He stretched slightly and yawned, still feeling tired, even with some food in him. "It is really nice to.... (yawn) be able to just relax like this for a... (yawn) change." |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
"Cutter smiled softly as he settled back down on the couch, he finished off his soup and a bit more of his food, deciding to leave the rest for later. "It is really nice," he agreed, finding that he couldn't think of another better word to describe how he was feeling right now ... just how nice it was being here with Connor again. It was almost like old times. "I ... I ... " he hesitated, starting to feel a bit drowsy himself, "it is nice, being able to do this again ... I ... I'd forgotten how nice this was," He really needed to find another adjective to use other than nice but couldn't think of one right then. |
Connor anomaly_research_nerd) |
Connor smiled and closed his eyes, letting himself relax for the first time in quite a while. And as his mind was yelling at him to be careful and not get too close to Cutter this soon and his heart telling him this was all he wanted and exactly what he missed, Connor leaned over, resting his head on Cutter's shoulder as he started to drift off a little. He knew this was dangerous territory he as getting into. He knew deep down he wasn't ready to go back to Cutter. There were things he still had to figure out. But he had missed this so much. And as the pain, fatigue, and loneliness took over in that moment, Connor gave in and let his guard down enough to fall asleep there beside Cutter. |
Cutter itsananomaly) |
Cutter's heart ached as Connor settled in to fall asleep, he was starting to feel sleepy and he knew that there were things they had to talk about first, that they couldn't just pick up where things had left off as much as he desperately wanted to and he leaned against Connor and settled in to get comfortable and fall asleep. "I love you Connor," he said softly just before he started to fall asleep. |
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“how are you feeling?” he looked over at Connor, realising he was awake.
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He carefully handed the mail over, “here you go,” he said, trying to not have his excitement about Connor’s acceptance ruin the surprise but he was finding it hard to stay quiet about it.
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"Dear Mr. Temple, we are pleased to inform you that your application has been accepted for the CMU Evolutionary Science program...." Connor read the rest of the letter to himself and then looked up at Cutter with a big grin. "I'm in!"
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He had thought this celebration would be a lot different but now he was determined to be as supportive as he could of Connor, be there for him when he needed it, even if they weren’t together anymore.
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Connor then realized Cutter probably didn't know what focus he had finally decided on. "I'm thinking of going with the Evolutionary ecology focus. I figured it would give me a lot of options on where I wanted to go once I get the degree finally."
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"I had been thinking of taking the aquatic ecology and the terrestrial ecology course to start with. So, good to know my judgment wasn't totally off the mark there" he said with a small grin. "And I definitely think the animal behaviors one would be good too!"
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"A little more practical application and experience would be nice. That way I'd be able to do a lot of different things if I wanted, even something outside paleontology specifically."
It hurt to have to think that way but with his future, both with Cutter and his career and work with the ARC in general, now in question, Connor knew he needed to be making choices that gave him the most freedom and the greatest number of options for what he could do down the road.
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There was another sheepish pause, "when I turned up for classes that was,' he added.
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"The first few classes I take will probably be online too, make it easier to figure out schedules and routines, and will also give me time to clear possible work stuff with Blathers and see what portals I can arrange to get to any in-person classes without being away from Fandom for too long."
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Even if Connor didn't want his help at first, he still wanted him to know that this time, he was going to be the supportive friend he should have been before, while he did wish that things were different ... if all he could do was be a good friend this time round, then that's what he would do.
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"Thanks, Nick" he said with a soft smile as he leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes, letting things just process for a bit as he tried to relax.